I find a lot of my own identity in working with teams of creative people and being able to express myself in a way that may not always involve pen and paper. Without a to-do list, I probably wouldn’t have made it past high school. The need to preoccupy my time with extracurriculars has carried over throughout my university experience and has, without a doubt, made my time at Queen’s invaluable. Before I take on any role, responsibility, or project, I tend to ask myself if I’m doing it for the sake of doing it. For the sake of crossing off another task on the to-do list. There will always be things that need to be done that I’m not fond of, but I don’t think that means they have to be avoided at all costs. Making that decision, however, requires determining if I’m forcing my creativity or not. 

When it comes to writing, deadlines are a funny thing. The pressure to be consistently writing, articulating thoughts in a way that makes sense, and hoping that they resonate with someone puts a lot of pressure on the task of writing itself. The constant flow of information and a surge in overwhelming channels of content creation has caused a loss of authenticity, especially when writing is directly tied to one's livelihood. I can’t help but mention the influx of digital microinfluencers and a subsequent decline in content that feels truly personal. Some have said that we are approaching  the ‘end of the influencer era,’ where consumers are turning to value authenticity above the ability to sell a product, where it once was the opposite. When content creation becomes a means of solely making money, any hope of creativity in the process is lost. This is not to suggest that every piece of writing needs to take the reader on an emotional experience, but it becomes relatively easy to decipher content that is made for the purpose of crossing it off the to-do list. 

I can’t confidently tell you the last time I didn’t have an upcoming deadline. Whether for an assignment, an application, or an article, there’s always something to do. Yes, in a way, they keep me going. They keep me moving forward and becoming a better writer and person. Scheduling will always be my forte. It will always be something I look forward to, and I’ll still find a little bit of joy in completing that to-do list, although I know it shouldn’t be my only motivator. The process of writing is why I keep going back, and I think that that’s something every writer—beginner or experienced—should find joy in. Taking breaks is just as important as writing, in my opinion. Without them, you become much more susceptible to what seems like inevitable burn out, and you lose sight of what is actually important: nurturing the creative process, which requires time for rest.

When coming up with pitches, I try my best to brainstorm based on the thoughts that have been on my mind recently, the things that I’ve experienced, or the lessons I’ve learned. These usually stem from a book that I’ve read, a show I’ve watched, or a conversation I’ve had. I never take my ability to translate my jumbled up thoughts and emotions into written word for granted, and I’ve found that I’m a much more effective communicator when I’m given the time to write my responses out. After taking on so many roles that require research, writing, and publishing, I now know what it takes to burn me out. You start to question if what you’re writing actually matters, or whether the message you’re trying to convey is really a message at all. There is a huge part of me that writes for myself, as the paragraphs locked away in my notes app would suggest. There’s another part of me that writes for the girl that was too afraid to ever speak up or to share her opinion. Somewhere along the line, I started writing for the future version of myself; the girl who would read these back in a few years and probably have a couple good laughs about what she thought was the end of the world. The constant in all these pieces is that nothing is ever forced. From the headline to the last word, it’s genuine, and those tend to be my favourite articles to write. 

Empty words; that is the term that haunts me as a writer. In the way that I write, if I can’t find meaning in what I’m speaking on, it subconsciously means that my experiences have no meaning. If that is true, then why am I here? It can very easily lead to a downward spiral of never wanting to share a single thought with the world ever again. To counteract that feeling, I draw on what my writing means to me and how I experience everyday life. Every day cannot be the greatest day of your life and every piece of writing cannot be your best work, but that’s what makes the great days and the great writing so special. This article itself is most definitely not the best thing I’ve attached my name to, but as I wrote it, it allowed me to reflect on all the other things I’ve written, and how I probably thought the same thing about them at the time. It’s also allowed me to understand that there cannot be a one-size-fits-all approach when it comes to writing. Some write best under pressure and some write best when they have all the time in the world. In a similar fashion, it takes time to find your own voice and I’m so fortunate to have the ability to do that through MUSE. 

I hope there never comes a time where I don’t have something to write about. I hope I never run out of things to say or to-do lists to cross off. For now, I’ll keep writing (and I hope you keep reading!). 

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