Caroline

This piece is a part of MUSE Online’s 2022 Mental Health Theme Week. The MUSE team would like to emphasize that this piece may be triggering to some as it touches on topics of mental health and mental illness.
Disclaimer: MUSE Online acknowledges and makes it known that this piece is based on a personal experience and recognizes that others may have differing experiences.

The breeze blows through the cliché meadow

We stand there, silent, hand in hand

Caroline and I, surrounded by dandelions so yellow

To most it’s beauty, yet to me it’s bland

With eyes the colour of the fertile earth

And hair so long it hugged her waist

Her look of beauty was beyond any worth

As she stood with me, face to face

Each and every man who’s lived a life

For those past and present, all the same

No matter if they had children, a fiancé, a wife

They’d give their life to know her name 

And yet I’m here and she’s right there

Now, as she leans in for a kiss

I stand still, wrapped up in her long brown hair

Feeling none of this supposed bliss

I allow her lips to meet mine

And I start to ask why I’m not filled with glee

I’m searching and praying for a sign

She pulls herself away from me

She bursts into tears and then collapses

I wish I felt some sympathy

What should I make of the circumstances 

Is there something wrong with me?

I’ve reached each man’s dream and turned it down

I’d rather be hurt than feel this numb

I look at her and see her slowly lose her frown

Was I worried for nothing? Now I feel dumb

The meadow’s grass wilts and the dirt turns to sand

The dandelions die and the skies turn grey

Caroline doesn’t react, still holding my hand

She turns her head, and opens her mouth to say

“Isn’t the meadow beautiful?”

I force a smile and nod

Article By: J.J

Graphic By: Rida Chaudhry