Fading Connection

Illustration by Rowan Fartousi

What they never tell you is that a part of you will always be left behind. 

When you’ve spent enough time in a place with certain people, you may never imagine leaving. Leaving is something that may seldomly cross your mind while experiencing some of the most joyful moments of your life. Time does not move through you, rather you move through time, because every moment feels infinite. You no longer feel limited by anyone or anything because your entire focus is on the people who are with you wholly. These people are the only thing that exists and the only thing your eyes can see. The same people that saw you for everything that you are and everything that you will be. 

The silly bits. 

The unsure bits. 

The comfortable bits. 

The joyful bits. 

The rare gift of connection, genuine connection, is something that some go an entire lifetime seeking, yet never come across it. When you do come across it, it is as if a part of your heart and a part of yourself is indebtedly attached to the people with whom you share that connection with. It is a gift that you allow yourself to cherish. It is also a gift that is granted by them because they show you and share bits of themselves with you that are nothing but remarkable and unique. It is as rare a beauty as it is a gift when this happens.

You come back “home” and a part of you is still back there and may very well always be. There’s an emptiness that has a sense of permanence because the only way to fill it is to return. Return to the place where you feel less of an “other”. The only place offering any gift of connection. A gift that allows you to be exposed and show yourself in ways that most people at “home” will find hard to grasp.

A gift granted by one and accepted by another. Connection at its essence.