Unraveling Toronto’s Underground

Navigating Writer's Block: An Insight into Turbochrist's Creative Journey

Illustration: Keira Sainsbury

As I sat down with my friend Tanner - better known as Turbochrist, I was eager to dive into his unique creative process. All of his music is recorded at home, using his closet as a makeshift studio. “It’s cozy and private, and it helps me focus,” he explained. “I handle all the engineering myself which can be a challenge, but it’s also incredibly rewarding. It’s a way for me to fully express my vision.”

His sound is shaped by a diverse range of influences, including Nick Drake, Death Cab for Cutie, Yo La Tengo, and The Microphones. He likes to blend folk music with aspects of a flash video game. Recently a lot of his inspiration has come from Erin - his girlfriend and a close friend of mine.

However, amidst this creative backdrop, Turbochrist is grappling with writer’s block. “I find myself grappling with a familiar foe: writer’s block,” he reflected. “It feels different now that I’m older and more self-aware. In my teenage years, it was easy to pen down feelings of sadness and victimhood. The world happened to me, and I would churn out melancholy poems that resonated with those emotions. But now, finding that balance is tougher. I want my music to convey a deeper meaning, something beyond the surface-level ‘oh, poor me’ narrative.”

He pointed to his first EP Rice Lake, “Those emotions flowed freely through me, allowing my inner child to express itself through the music. Now, I find myself in a different emotional landscape—more optimistic and pessimistic about everything simultaneously. It’s a confusing state that makes writing about how I feel right now much harder.”

I encouraged him to explore these feelings further, asking how he navigates the pressure to express himself authentically. “This struggle to take responsibility for my lyrics is daunting,” he admitted. “I’m trying to own up to my shortcomings, but I don’t want it to devolve into a pity fest. Consolidating all these conflicting themes into a cohesive product feels overwhelming.”

Turbochrist envisions his new project as “PRODUCT,” representing himself as a neurochemical sum of his life experiences and his early, chaotic introduction to the internet. “’PRODUCT’ symbolizes what I leave behind in my wake; every action contributes to a cumulative net positive or negative in the world. Yet, the irony is that I haven’t fully grasped what I am as a product, which leads me back to writer’s block.”

As we wrapped up our conversation, it became clear that Turbochrist’s journey is one of resilience and self-discovery. “It’s all part of the journey—understanding that the process is just as important as the final product,” he remarked. “With each option I explore for this project, I remind myself that the future is bright. I just need to navigate the complexities of my thoughts.”

Ultimately, Turbochrist is learning that his struggle with writer’s block is integral to his artistic journey. “It’s a process of self-discovery, and perhaps, in time, the writer’s block will give way to something profound.”